Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Positive Relationship

Whatever the cause, my nerves are frazzled. Maybe it's the hormones. Or perhaps a full moon will be upon us soon. Perhaps it's the fact that my husband's been out of town for a few days, my son's at college, and there's just not quite enough testosterone within our home necessary to mitigate all the estrogen and progesterone floating around. My daughters, ages 14 and 11, have been bickering with each other. A lot. Not full-blown arguments. Just the annoying, continuous eye-rolling, mixed with the sarcastic comments, added to the what-in-the-world-are-you-talking-about look that accompanies the simplest of questions. Neither daughter claims to have "started" any of the heated discussions, yet both feel the need to release the final word, or provide the last look of disdain, or make the last annoying sound. Sounds like the clicking of the tongue, or the audible clearing of the throat.

What is it with women/girls? My experience as a nurse, mom, wife, sister and daughter tells me that men don't act this way. They just don't. It's almost as if men simply don't have the time for such silliness. In its simplest form, maybe when young women behave in this manner it is a way for them to "rehearse" the skills necessary for survival - to win out the other women in search of finding the strongest mate. But how is a mom supposed to cope with the daily "survival of the fittest" role playing that takes place in her own living room?

I'd read somewhere once that according to some studies, there is a higher divorce rate among parents that have 2 or more daughters than among those with two or more sons. Good thing that my husband is out of town this week.

Funny thing is that I remember bickering with my own sister, when we were younger, decades ago. Maybe it's genetics? Maybe I have a dominate trait for bickering that was passed on to my offspring. Oh dear. This is getting more and more somber as I write.

I think that at this very moment, now that my two young daughters are finally tucked away in their beds sleeping peacefully, now would be a perfect time for me to settle down with a glass of my favorite wine, and wrap myself in one of my coziest afghans with a good book that I have been waiting to finish. There are some days when I need to remind myself that this too will pass. After all, my mom made it through - survived it all, if you will - so I know that I can, too.

I don't know if there's any validity to the relationship between divorce rates and raising daughters. But I'll bet that, compared to moms with sons, there is definitely a positive relationship between moms with daughters and the amount of gray hair on their heads!